The Wisdom of Merle

or How to live through one week at college.. ughh.

1. Rules of Sleep
2. Fun with Ramen
3. Practical Drinkmixing for the Minor
4. Becoming a Programmer

Sleep

A few rules of thumb..

• Every hour that you miss lowers your IQ by at least 4pts until you catch up.
• The best way to avoid sleep is to be in mortal terror of your life.
• When you skip an hour of sleep you will need to sleep for at least 1 1/2 hours extra before you will return to normal.
• It is impossible to fake having had a good night's rest, so if (for instance) you go on a sleepover and do not sleep, tell your parents when you return home. They may be angry, but it beats falling asleep in front of them during dinner and waking up grounded.
• Sometimes you can feign illness, if you need to sleep badly.
  Don't try this more than once a year, though, or they will catch on.
• It is easier to stay awake if you are hungry.
• Every two hours of sleep that you miss will either halve your high-score or double it.

How to make Ramen Noodles FASTER !!!

or Fun with Ramen Noodles

Making Cup of Ramen Noodle without Hot Water

1. Open cup as little as possible (about 1-2 cm) (less than an inch).
2. Find a water fountain
3. Because there is no way to see the line inside the container without ripping off the entire top, here is how to tell when to stop adding water:
   Add water to the cup until the little vegetables start to float when you level the container.
4. Put the cup in the microwave.
5. Zap the food for at least one and a half minutes.
6. Remove the cup from the microwave.
7. Carry around for at least five minutes before opening.
   The food is better if you can wait ten minutes, but it is edible after five.
8. Open the cup and Eat. It is sometimes a little crunchy, but it is still good. Yum.

Flaming Super Ramen Noodle

I use Oriental Ramen for this, but it will probably work with other flavors too..

1. Add 1 tsp. Sesame Oil
   If you do not have sesame oil, then you will have to add a pat of butter when I tell you to (not yet!).
2. Dish Ramen: Add the flavor packet now.
   Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES put in oil after adding the flavor packet and before adding water.
3. Add 1/4 tsp. Crushed and Dried Hot Peppers (the kind that they have at Pizza Hut tm).
4. Add water until
   Dish Ramen: The noodle floats.
   Cup Ramen: The water reaches the line.
5. If you did not have any of the oil mentioned earlier, then add the pat of butter now.
6. Microwave until the food starts fizzing,
   Or follow the Microwave directions on the package..
7. Wait until cool.

An Introduction to the Gentle Art of Drink Mixing

OR - Making Flavors that the Self-Service Drink Machine Doesn't Have!!

Graep Drink
1 pt. Coke tm or Pepsi tm
1 pt. Orange drink
1 pt. Mr Pibb tm or Dr. Pepper tm
Let stand 15 minutes or till flat.
Serve on ice.
..tastes purple, just like cheap grape soda.
---
Acid Cola
1 pt. (pink) Lemonade
3 pt. Sprite tm or Mountain Dew tm
1 pt. Mr Pibb tm or Dr Pepper tm (add for color)

Looks just like Coke tm or Pepsi tm.  Just wait until they
take a sip and find out that this is the MOST ACIDIC DRINK
EVER since Grapefruit Juice !! splatoogh !!  Try to avoid
getting hit in the eyes.. it really hurts.. ;(
---
I am still trying to recreate my Kreem Soada drink.  Stay Tuned..!

• Do not ever use much Hawaiian Punch tm or Lemonade Drink tm.
  Their flavors overpower all of the others.
• Pepsi tm and Coke are good filler drinks. Use them if you need to top off a glass for some reason.
• When designing drinks, it is good if you are in a store that offers free refills.
  My favorite is Taco Bell tm, but that may be because I like their food a lot.

  ;)

Becoming a Programmer